Believe it or not, there actually are few books on dealing with narcissists. The problem is, most of the time we can't deal with them. They have a reality that only changes when they are fired, disowned, or somehow totally disconnected from contact by you moving without a forwarding address.
But other than the above solutions, we do have a few books. Here is a list.
Emotional Vampires: Dealing With People Who Drain You Dry
Dinosaur Brains: Dealing with All THOSE Impossible People at Work
The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissis...
Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving & Thriving With the Self-Absorbed
Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life
Help, I'm in Love with a Narcissist
The Object of My Affection Is in My Reflection: Coping with Narcissists
Enough About You, Let's Talk About Me: How to Recognize and Manage the Narcissists in Your Life
Narcissistic Lovers: How to Cope, Recover and Move On
How to Talk to a Narcissist
One Angry Daughter
You Might Be a Narcissist If... - How to Identify Narcissism in Ourselves and Others and What We Can Do About It
Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Monday, March 2, 2009
The problem with this world is that narcissists are in it. Narcissists are a dime a dozen and we need to find the guy supplying the dimes.
The myth is that narcissists are people that love themselves. Maybe they think they are better than anyone else. Maybe they live on their own pedestal and think the world revolves around them. Maybe narcissists are full of gravity standing on a post, but it is not the reason we dislike these people.
We have no problem smart and talented people. It's the ones that treat people like scum that are card carrying narcissists.
The narcissists are controlling, annoying, nasty, evil people. Is it a wonder that we think that they think they are better than us? Not because they say such things, but because they say we are so unworthy, stupid, incompetent, clumsy, sloppy, etc.
Sometimes narcissist are mean in the nicest and most sincere ways, but you know it when you smell it. Other times it is raining shame and embarrassment. The narcissist is always working. That's how you know for sure.
This blog is about recognizing the narcissist and fighting back. Odds are you can't change a narcissist. In fact, some psychologists say that narcissist can't be cured. But we can figure out a few ways not to play their game. Lets start with the two most important secrets of narcissism.
This first secret is very important. Not everyone knows this, but it is like gold. Narcissists are actually just like us. They are out of control, sloppy, lazy, and more incompetent than you or I could ever imagine. But they hid this with their narcissistic methods of belittling the rest of us. It is a smoke screen. Even a very talented narcissist has a huge flaw they hide with their nasty demeanor.
The next secret may seem strange to you at first. If you are dealing with a narcissist right now will make perfect sense. This is more than gold, this is like a diamond as big as your head. This information is the kryptonite to narcissists. It might not kill them like superman, but it will give you peace of mind and let you cope with a narcissist you are forced to live with. Here it is: A narcissist feels the most peace and most in control of their lives when the people around them are feeling awful, stressed, angry, and out of control. The calmer and better you feel, the worse they feel.
With these two secrets about narcissists, you have a lot of power.
More to come. Add yourself as a fan. Give us your comments, horror stories, and even success against these evil creatures that make vampires seem like cute kittens. This blog and the accompanying book (now in production) is also meant to be fun.
The best way to ruin a narcissists day is to have fun.